I just had an epiphany. A HUGE one (thats what she said). First love never dies - I learned that that was bullshit a while ago. First of, let me start by saying, that I'm a nice person. I'm a really nice person. I've put people before myself too many times and I always make myself the last priority - it isn't a good thing, but that's the way I am. So now, I find myself staring at a hopeless case. A SERIOUSLY hopeless case. You know who I liked? I liked the old person he was. The nice person he was. A few months ago, I realized he wasn't that same person, and I gave up loving and resorted to caring. I figured, I care about everyone, he might not be that bad a person, I can still allot a part of my self to this person. I was SO wrong. He is a different person - a selfish, try-hard, jerk of a person. All I can say is that, I tried. I tried, and he didn't have to do anything for me to know, that he is a hopeless phony that doesn't deserve anyone's love because he's just a complete and total asshole of a person.

When i compare him to my current boyfriend, all I can do is scoff at how insignificant his life is. How he's an embarassment. He's rude and demeaning, and hasn't shown the least bit of sympathy for a girl who his ex-girlfriend punched in the face for no self-proven reason. NOT only that, he's rude to his sister who loves him to death and looks up to his STUPID habits, thats only benefit is to influence his sister, which to me would be HORRIBLE! He snubs a guy who considered him his bestfriend at the mall, because now he's cool. Now he's not nerdy, geeky ***** who plays computer games and is going no where. He's cool because he can skateboard and wear nice shoes, and yea he's in college so that gives him an excuse to look down at other people and pretend like he's the king of his "gang". He's pathetic & now I realize HOW pathetic.....&&& YOU KNOW WHAT? i honestly don't give a shit about that little scumbag anymore. he doesn't have a place in my life anymore. i can finally do what he did to me 2 years ago. erase him from my life.